The OPEC of brackets.

Syntax Energy Co. is a pre-revenue utility with a finished store, a live control room, and a total addressable market equal to every uncaught exception since 1952. We will not take your money until the co-packer answers the phone. We will take your email.

The model is simple. Direct-to-developer beverage at sixty points of margin. Digital certificates at ninety-four. Enterprise retainers at the price of a single confused sustainability hire. The last one is the business. The cans are how the business gets into Slack.

DTC target

$4.2M yr 1

Enterprise target

$8.6M yr 1

Gross margin mix

71%

Employees

the grid

We are not raising. We are harvesting. If you are a fund that understands both energy and jokes, the form on Enterprise is the same form. Write “investor” in the note. We will know.